God is Awake

"Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones; and when you have laboriously accomplished your daily tasks, go to sleep in peace. God is awake." ~ Victor Hugo

A lovely thought, no? It takes courage to get through those great sorrows (and we all have them - if we haven't, we know that we will) and it takes patience to endure the small ones. And when we have slogged our way through the day, sorrowing and worrying and praying, we can go to sleep in peace because we know that God is awake.

He is involved in each of our lives. He knows us, He loves us, and He is in control. I need to remember this, especially when I am feeling most stressed, least peaceful and entirely out of control.

He is awake.

You Never Know

I looked at this little cartoon today and laughed because it's so true. You truly have no idea what your influence is going to be on anyone, especially children.

That's something I have totally enjoyed about Facebook: getting back in touch with people I knew and loved at some point in my life, but (sadly) may never ever see in person again. They may be old friends, former students or even family members who are now spread out across the world.

It's such a gift to hear that maybe, something you did some time ago made a difference to someone. It lifts up my heart and helps me to move on in the day-to-day grind to know that something I did may have made a difference. Reminded me of a little poem I read long ago:

You Never Know
Author Unknown

You never know when someone
May catch a dream from you.
You never know when a little word,
Or something you may do
May open up a window
Of the mind that seeks the light
The way you live may not matter at all...
But you never know - it might.

And just in case it could be
That another's life through you.
Might possibly change for the better
With a broader brighter view.
It seems it might be worth a try
At pointing the way to the right.
Of course, it may not matter at all,
But then again it might.

Which in turn inspires me to be more vocal and verbal about the gratitude I feel for those who have been and continue to be life-changers for me. There are many and I am so grateful.

I Can Do Hard Things

If I am to be totally honest, I will say that 2011 has not started out to be such a great year. There have been some hard things going on, including not feeling all that well, which seems to affect everything in life. Mark and I have both had colds/allergies/complications - he has been sicker than I have (he went to see the doc and came back with steroids, antibiotics and asthma meds) and I haven't (thank goodness) had the cough that he has had. I've just had the congestion, the difficulty catching my breath (yay for already having asthma meds! ha!) and the headaches.

Add to that just the everyday frustrations and tough issues that we all deal with and well, I am feeling like I'm probably not doing as well as I could. As I pondered this, (and prayed too, - doing a lot of that lately) I remembered what Julie B. Beck, the General Relief Society President said once - -"We can do hard things".

Yes, we can. And I am. Not very gracefully yet, but I am trying. And I know I can do it, with the help of dear loving family, good friends, and a loving Heavenly Father who will guide every one of us.

I'm so thankful for that knowledge, and I will keep on trying.

New Year's Resolution #2

I want to spend time every day this year enjoying small {but important} things. Like today. First I spent a few minutes with Maya, as I dropped her off at school. Pure pleasure to chat with her first thing in the morning, and I am 100% committed to sending her off with a happy start to her day. {It's sure a happy start to mine.}

After that I spent an hour in her classroom, reading with some not-so-proficient readers. Again, low-key but fun. Then after a few minutes hanging out with the first-graders in the school cafeteria, I left to have lunch with a dear, wonderful friend. We didn't eat anywhere fancy {Galaxy -- good but not fancy, and we both had their mushroom-swiss burger. Far from fancy food, just plain yummy.} We chatted about this and that and just generally enjoyed each other's company.

From there, I got to go spend time with my little Mason - while his mama ran an errand, we read 10 books together I think. And while we read, we visited and snuggled. Another little thing that really was a treasured part of my day.

I have so many wonderful people in my life, and as I enjoy each one of them, this year I also intend to let them know how important they are to me and how much they are loved.

This is when the small things really turn out to be the big things. And they make me happy.

New Year's Resolution #1

Love it!! And my fuzzy slippers too.

Happy New Year!!

A Christmas Prayer

A Christmas Prayer

Loving Father, help us remember the birth of Jesus,

that we may share in the song of the angels,

the gladness of the shepherds,

and worship of the wise men.

Close the door of hate

and open the door of love all over the world.

Let kindness come with every gift and good desires with every greeting.

Deliver us from evil by the blessing which Christ brings,

and teach us to be merry with clear hearts.

May the Christmas morning make us happy to be thy children,

and Christmas evening bring us to our beds with grateful thoughts,

forgiving and forgiven, for Jesus' sake. Amen.

-- Robert Louis Stevenson

There's not much I can add to this because it encompasses every thought I've had about the approach of Christmas this year. The blessings of Jesus can't be counted but they include the kindness, good desires, happiness and gratitude spoken of above.

At this very hectic and busy time of year, I always have to take a minute to read through this prayer. It quiets me, it centers me and it reminds me of what it is we are commemorating: the sweetest, most important gift we have ever been given.

Love and Christmas blessings to all!

December

At the risk of becoming (boring and) redundant, may I just say that I am amazed that it's already the first week of December? Again, where has the time gone?

We have one of our busiest weeks ever: I had my yearly physical (I'm healthy!), a dentist appt., a hair appt., Natie had a hair appt, (which involves me as the play-mate for the kiddoes), and the biggest time-sucker was our Stake Christmas fireside. I was the accompanist for the stake choir as well as another musical number -- and when you factor practice time into that, (both with the groups and on my own) it adds up to a lot of time, especially the week before the event.

But it was wonderful. The program was lovely, the spirit was strong, and the music was beautiful. I was so grateful to have been able to be as involved as I was in making beautiful music. It filled my heart and my soul and made all the work and time worth every second. I loved it.

And now we are looking at Christmas -- and if it happens like the rest of this year has, it will be here tomorrow. And there is so much to do. I feel the pressure building already. But this is when I have to remind myself of what it's really all about. It's not about finding the perfect present. In fact, it's not really about the presents at all. It's not about the lights, or the buying. It's about love. It's about sharing. It's about kindness and friendship. It's about Jesus, that baby in the manger, truly the greatest gift ever given.

There's still a lot to do, but I am reminded of the sweet poem by Christina Rosetti -- "What can I give Him? I'll give Him my heart." And that's what I really want to give to my loved ones. My heart. Sure, I will give them the gift I picked out, but mostly what I want them to know is how much I love them, and how much they matter to me in my life.

Jesus was the perfect example. He was a teacher, a doer of loving deeds, and a friend. This is the example I want to follow. I want to be like Him.

And that's what I want my friends and loved ones to receive this year, along with their gift. The knowledge of that love and the remembrance and gratitude for that miraculous birth and life, so long ago.

So during these next few weeks, let's all slow down, take a few minutes and remember the reason we celebrate. It's what really matters.

Grateful

It's nearly Thanksgiving, (how did that happen? Time is flying by at amazing speed!) and I have had gratitude on my mind and in my heart ever since General Conference. Pres. Monson's talk about gratitude spoke clearly to me and while gratitude is something I always try to cultivate, I know I"m far from perfect in expressing it. But I have so much and I truly am so grateful.

I'm grateful for all the 'usual' things - -friends, family, a wonderful husband, grandma-hood, a home that I love, and so many things. But I have been recently introduced to a new favorite song (appropriately entitled "Grateful") and there as a verse that spoke to me so clearly that I'm pretty sure I've already committed it to memory.

"I feel a hand holding my hand,

It's not a hand you can see.

But on the road to the promised land

That hand will shepherd me.

Through delight and despair,

Holding tight and always there.

Grateful, grateful,

Truly grateful I am.

Grateful, grateful.

Truly blessed and duly grateful."

(John Bucchino)

I am so grateful for that hand, which I feel often in my life. I have (finally) learned that giving thanks for the things I have makes me so much happier than keeping score and missing the things I don't have.

Happy Thanksgiving! I'm grateful for all of you.

True!

As I've said before -- the hope is that we love and honor much more than we annoy. I just know that my 'annoy' factor is pretty high and Mark's tolerance level is also pretty high and that's a good thing.

For both of us.

Ben's Posse

This is our grandson Ben. He is 5 years old now - -and has been diagnosed with autism. Ben is funny, smart, creative and sweet, and he and his family have been working together to find him the most help he can get so that he can have the best life possible. He, his mom and dad and his big brother Daniel are amazing. The things they have done and gone through to help Ben have made me so proud of them and have also humbled me tremendously. They love each other deeply and are truly a team. Not every child with autism has a family like Ben does and they are a big advantage for him.

We love them all and over time, I have learned to despise autism and all that it represents. And that is why we are joining them to walk in support of Autism Speaks. I have tried to figure out what I can do to help and there isn't much - -but I can do this. And you can help.

Please click here to go to my walking page and donate: anything helps and it all adds up. Help us support Ben and his posse. Yes, Ben has a posse and I'm a member. Please help us.

(Thanks to all of you who even made it through this post -- emotional grandma's pleas probably aren't all that fun to read.)