Love Without Tiring

"Do not think that love, in order to be genuine, has to be extraordinary. What we need is to love without getting tired." ~Mother Teresa

We had the funnest [wait, is that a word?!] time in Primary yesterday. Nothing spectacular happened, really, but it was just a lovely Sunday. As I looked out over the faces of all the children that are so dear to me, this quote surfaced in my mind. Mother Teresa really knew what she was talking about.

Love may not be the answer to everything, but it makes a difference to everyone. It's something that the scriptures say we should do without ceasing. It's something that is harder with some people than with others. But the bottom line is that we don't have to be exceptional and extraordinary. We just have to keep on loving. That's what makes it real.

Today my counselor Natalie and I spent a few minutes visiting with a little guy who has had a terrible time recovering from a tonsillectomy. Once again, I was flooded with the thought that what I need to do is to love the little ones that are part of my life. I was so relieved to see how well he is doing, to see his little face smiling at us and to receive his hug. What a gift!

So that's what I am going to do. Just keep on loving.

Milestones

Today, I got a phone call from Maya, telling me that she had lost her first tooth. She was so excited to call and share her news with me. What I can't take in is the fact that the tooth is out! How did this happen? Where did the time go? [I know she's a little early and that teeth generally do not come out at age 4, but really!] Amazing.

It's had me thinking about milestones and filled me with gratitude for the opportunities I have to be aware and participate in these milestones with a new generation of our family. I knew I always wanted grandchildren, but I never anticipated the joy I feel in each of these little people that are part of my life. I remember reading this somewhere: "A grandmother is a mother who has a second chance" and I loved it.

That says it all for me. As I look back, I'm not so sure I was a great mom. Don't get me wrong, I don't think I was a bad mom, but I can see lots of things I would change if I could. For example, I wouldn't threaten my kids with something that I really didn't want to carry through on. My kids knows exactly what I"m talking about here. I would hold my temper, and I would cherish every second with my three precious little ones. I think I spent too much time trying to be a great YW leader and not enough time trying to be a great mama.

So that's why I loved the quote about grandma-hood being a second chance. Now I know that I can love, love, love these precious grandkids without reservation. I know now that I won't spoil them. I can just play. I can listen, and I can put aside my 'important' duties as a Primary leader and just enjoy time with my sweeties. I can take the time to really hear the things they have to say, I can share what's important to them in their lives and not worry about what's important to me [because they are what's important to me]. There's never a danger of losing my temper now - -and I wonder why. Maybe because I know that there is nothing they can do that is worth that.

So, Daniel, Maya, Ben, Mason and soon Baby Simon -- thank you for giving me the greatest gift I've ever been given. You. I love all of you and I love being a part of your lives. I love it that you love me back.

Thanks for letting me be your grandma. You are among my sweetest blessings.

Course Corrections

"Remember: the heavens will not be filled with those who never made mistakes but with those who recognized that they were off course and who corrected their ways to get back in the light of gospel truth." ~Dieter F. Uchtdorf, "A Matter of a Few Degrees", Ensign, May 2008, 57–60

Thank goodness for this knowledge! It means there's hope for all of us.

Expressionary

I've already spent way too much time having fun with this site -- where you can personalize your stationery with your family, pets, hobbies and anything else you can think of. Check it out!!

Friends Matter

"When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive -- to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love." ~Marcus Aurelius

After a busy, stressful weekend, it's nice to be able to stop and realize what a gift my life really is. Despite the worries [Mark's continuing mysterious, nasty illness is what's on my mind in the 'worries' category], the busy-ness [yup, the play. You know what I'm talking about -- and I'm here to tell you that it's going to get worse before it gets better], the day-to-day issues of keeping the Primary staffed and running, and just life in general [I include still-aching feet in that one], it's a blessing to remember that life is wonderful.

It is a gift to be alive and it is a privilege. Friends help make it all worthwhile. And that's you.

I'm hoping we can all realize how important we are to those around us. Here's to a happy week!

Another Gas Price Rant

Every time Mark fills up his car [and bear in mind he is not filling up a big car - -he drives a very small PT Cruiser] I get mad when I have to subtract the amount from the checking account. It just shouldn't cost $50 to fill up a tiny little car like his. It really shouldn't.

I'm sure that if I wanted to buy Premium, my oldest son Chris would be in the hands of the gas companies right now.

Great Stuff!

Look what just arrived! They are even cuter in person than I thought they'd be [and I thought they'd be adorable!]. And what a bargain-- order 2 and get one for free. They are so reasonably priced, so quirky-cute and available in every color or style you could ever want. What I really love is that you can see the Scrabble tile each was made from when you turn the pendant over. Love it!! Go here and pick out some for yourself. I didn't 'need' 3 of them but I got one for myself and 2 for gifts. Doesn't get better than that!

Love, love, love them! Thanks, Home Studio!

Prayers Needed!

Some of you have inferred from my last post that I am worried about something and you would be right. Here's the story.

On Saturday, Mark noticed that the lymph nodes on the left side of his neck felt swollen. During the day, the swelling continued, and he started to notice hives appearing on his body. By Sunday night, there were an amazing amount of nasty looking hives [actually they really look like bad bee stings] that were itching and hurting, and the swelling of the lymph nodes had reached epic proportions. He was on the phone to his family doctor first thing Monday morning.

His doctor didn't know what was going on and sent him to see an ENT [ear, nose and throat specialist] on Tuesday. He too was baffled, but put Mark on an antibiotic in case it is a bacterial infection. He also scheduled a CT scan of the area of the lymph nodes so that they can see more of what's going on there.

By Tuesday night, he was literally covered with hives and we asked our Home Teachers to come and give him a blessing, which they did. This morning, there were more spots and he went back in to his family doctor, who sent him immediately to a dermatologist. The dermatologist checked him out, did a biopsy of one of the sores [each little hive seems to scab over and then the area looks like a nasty blood blister and then a big bruise begins to form - very weird] and potentially has a diagnosis. It has a name that Mark can't remember but it's a viral thing.

So now my poor sweetie is on prednisone, an anti-itch medication, the antibiotic [still just in case] and had the CT scan this afternoon. Once there are some results from the biopsy and CT scan, there may be more information.

For now, it looks like it could go on for 2-3 more weeks [ARGHHH!!] and the poor guy is miserable. I hate this for him. I can't begin to tell you how I hate it for him. The pictures really only show the very tip of the iceberg with the hives. It's sad. Very sad.

So, add him [and us] to your prayer list if you would. I know that when we put our needs in the hands of the One who can really do something, things happen. And once again, I am reminded that we can't do it alone.

**Edited note: Mark tells me that actually, on Sunday night and Monday morning, there were only a very few little hives, nothing much to be concerned about really -- but they have multiplied at an amazing rate.

When Life is a Puzzle

"When we can't piece together the puzzle of our own lives, remember the best view of a puzzle is from above. Let Him help put you together." ~Amethyst Snow-Rivers

When worries weigh me down, I have to remember that there is someone who knows the way through this maze we call life and has a plan for each of us. I must rely on His view and His ability to put [and keep] me together.

Isaiah's writings are such a mystery most of the time but this couldn't be more clear:

"Hast thou not known? Has thou not heard that the everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not, neither is weary? There is no searching of His understanding. He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might He increaseth strength. Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall: but they that wait up on the Lord shall renew their sterength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary: and they shall walk and not faint." [Isaiah 40:28-30]

Footprints on my Heart

I have a little plaque on my kitchen wall that I look at every day. It was a gift from a dear friend that I met when we lived in Idaho. The reality is that I haven't seen her in a long time [probably at least 20 years] and we haven't been in touch in nearly that long. I don't even really know where she is living now. I think of her every day when I see the plaque and wonder how she is and what she is doing.

"Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while and leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same." [unknown]

Today I got an email from another friend, one that I met when we lived in Las Vegas. We clicked immediately and always enjoyed being together. We share a love of music and loved it when she would sing and I would accompany her. But life has been busy since our move, I didn't have an email or street address for her and I haven't heard from her [nor she from me] since probably before October of '04. It was so good to hear from her and to do a little catch-up on what's gone on in her life since we were last together.

And as I read her message and composed my response, I realized that she had surely left footprints on my heart -- just as the first friend has done, and so many others that have passed through my life. I feel so blessed to have had so many good people to love and be loved by and so many opportunities to meet more good people.

My heart is full of footprints and I'm so grateful.