He (or she) Who Sees

“Every common bush is afire with God ––but only he who sees takes off his shoes.”~Elizabeth Barrett Browning

I read this recently and it has stuck with me. I'm sure you recognize the reference to the story of Moses and the burning bush: as Moses approached the bush, he removed his shoes because he knew he was standing on holy ground. I have always loved that because I really want to be not only the one who sees, but the one who figuratively takes off her shoes.

That's another goal for me this year: to be aware of God's marvelous hand in each of our lives, and going along with that, to treat that Hand with respect, reverence and gratitude.

Happy New Year!

"Count no day lost in which you waited your turn, took only your share and sought advantage over no one." ~Robert Brault I'm not a great resolution-maker, but I think I'm going to take the above quote and use it as my mantra for the new year. No one could have put it better: to wait my turn, to take only my share and seek advantage over no one describes perfectly the kind of person I want to be. So, we are excited for 2012! This past year wasn't our best year, I don't think: {some hard things, some expensive things, some unexplainable things etc. etc.} although there were definitely some happy things, some fun things and much love and joy as well. I am excited to see what 2012 brings. And if I turn Robert Brault's criteria for a productive day into my own goals for the year, it will be a good one for me growth-wise. Welcome, 2012!

It's Christmas!

"You can never truly enjoy Christmas until you can look up into the Father's face and tell him you have received His Christmas gift." ~John R. Rice

Here it is almost Christmas eve {already!} and I wanted to take a minute to reflect and be grateful, once again, for the most precious Christmas gift ever given. And it was given to each of us: to all of us!

Jesus was not only the baby born under miraculous circumstances, nor was He only a master teacher. He was an exemplar, a friend, a guide, and probably most important, He is the one who willingly carried the burden of our sins, our pains, our fears, our frustrations: He is the one who understands our every fear, our heartbreak, and every feeling that we have had or will have. And because He carried those burdens for us, our yokes are easy and our burdens are light.

I am so grateful for His miraculous birth that we celebrate at Christmas but more, I am grateful for His life, His death, and His atoning sacrifice which is His all-encompassing gift to each of us: the prospect of eternal life.

Let earth receive her king! Let each of us receive our king!

Merry Christmas!

beautiful picture by Liz Lemon Swindle

Happy Anniversary!

"Sometimes two people stay together for the sake of the kids -- two kids who sat under a full moon and pledged to be forever true." ~Robert Brault

I am a real fan of Robert Brault. He has a gift of words that I wish I had. Since I don't, I enjoy his gift and the above quote has been on my mind ever since I read it. I suspect it's because we (Mark and I) are nearly ready (on Dec. 21) to celebrate our (gulp!) 37th anniversary.

I was just telling our Natalie that back when we were dating (when we were those kids!), I wasn't particularly careful, cautious or prayerful about who I chose. I just got lucky and fell in love with the right man. And I was equally lucky that he fell in love with me, too.

We have had a huge variety of experiences together as we have zig-zagged back and forth across the country. Life has been full of learning together -- through all kinds of experiences, some wonderful and some not so great. I am so grateful for him in my life. He has been and continues to be the constant that I lean on in every circumstance. There are things we have been through together that I could not have handled without him.

Mark is smart, funny, spiritually in tune, a hard worker, devoted to his family, a great dad and a super wonderful Grandpa. (Who else would not only go along with regular phone calls to his office line during working hours so that a precious 3 year old can hear him say "Hi, Simey!" but be thrilled with the opportunity?!) He works so hard for us and would do anything for anyone who needed his help.

I am grateful that when we met, I was behaving well enough that he wanted to be with me as much as I wanted to be with him. And that now, knowing what he knows about me (37 years worth, and it's not all good!), I feel blessed that he's willing to go on - -as far as we can go -- together.

And I get to keep him. I am blessed, for sure.

Running Against the Wind

As I did my (nearly) 4 mile run (seriously felt more like I was trudging!) yesterday, I had a bit of an epiphany. It's fall here (on the calendar, anyhow - not necessarily temperature wise) and we have cooled down slightly. We also have had a bit of wind. Not much, mind you, and not anything that someone raised in Southern Alberta should even dare to call a wind -- but enough to notice when you're running against it.

So yesterday, as I did my 4 mile run (remember? the trudge!), I was acutely aware of the wind. But I only really noticed it when I was running against it. It pushed me back and I had to work extra hard to get myself up the Austin hills (we do live in the 'Hill Country' here). I can tell you that I resented that wind. It made me cranky and (obviously) it made my tired legs more tired and there was some serious gasping going on as well.

What I found interesting, though, is that when I was running with the wind at my back, it didn't feel like much of a wind. Just a little push in the right direction.

And that's when I had the epiphany. It's just like life. When we are running against the wind, and things are hard, we are totally aware of the opposition. We are frustrated by it, we are tired by it, and it makes us want to give up.

But when that wind is at our back, gently pushing us along our chosen path? We rarely notice it. And that's my point. I want to be aware of that wind at my back, gently moving me along the path of my life. I want to be aware and I want to be grateful.

I have so much to appreciate and to be grateful for, and this Thanksgiving month is a great time to reflect on that wind that is at my back so much of the time.

Feeling Grateful

I have had the privilege recently to be an accompanist for a "Time Out for Women" presenter. She has a great message to share and she tells her story both with words and with music. I have traveled with her to Nashville {which I loved because we still have sweet ties to that place}, to Pocatello {which I loved because a wonderful former seminary student from Reno lives there now and I got to spend the 2 days with her}, and recently to Reno. We have loved and enjoyed all the places we've lived, but Reno has a special place in my heart because it's there that I taught not just 1 seminary class a day, but 2 -- and I was the Primary chorister as well, in a really wonderful, loving ward that took great care of me while I was seriously ill. So we have so many sweet memories of Reno, as well as some ties that will never be cut.

It was such a gift to be back there, and to catch up with so many people that I love. I think the sweetest thing has been to realize that while I remember and love many Reno friends - -the reality is that they remember and love me too. That's not something I consider very often. I have always felt that when we leave an area, we probably don't cross the minds of those we have left behind very often. I cherish all the friends we have made but haven't ever assumed that they remember me.

My Reno visit proved me wrong. I was humbled to find so many people there that still remember me (???) and love me and it touched my heart in a way that I will never forget.

What a sweet blessing to know that these people, who mean so much to me and who I will always remember and love -- remember me too. It was a lovely weekend.

**Me with a former seminary student and friend, Amber. She's not only beautiful, but wonderful too.

I Can Do It!

I am so proud of myself. I just finished week 9, day 1 of Couch to 5K - -and I flew today. Really felt like I had wings on my feet. The weather has cooled down slightly {by that I mean we are in the 90's instead of the 100's - but I do feel the difference!}and I am feeling like I could run and run and run.

I didn't do that because I am convinced that this couch to 5K program really works, so I am continuing to follow it exactly. But this week is my last one {the program ends - -and I will have finished it!} and I will be on my own after that. What I have learned over this nearly 9 weeks that I've been back running is that I can do it. And in conjunction with that, I have also realized that I can do anything I put my mind to do. Right now, that means I can run for 30 minutes without a break and that feels good.

My body might be old{er} but I am happy to announce that it will do whatever I ask it to do, as long as I take good care of it.

Great news, right?!!

I'm Still a Runner! (Who knew?)

Anyone who knows me at all knows a couple of things about me - -that I was an avid runner {think 6 - 7 miles a day, pretty much 6 days a week} for many years. Like probably 15 or so. Maybe more. I loved running. I started out walking and eventually, just to make things more interesting, would challenge myself to 'run to that tree' or 'run to the corner'. After that, I got competitive with myself and would see how much faster I could do my regular route than the day before. And I got hooked. I loved running.

Fast-forward to our move here in 2004: heredity + years of running = foot problems. I had a couple of surgeries and decided I could not keep running as my feet hurt 100% of the time. So I switched my allegiance to the elliptical machine which is great exercise, and is weight-bearing without impact. I learned {after quite some time} to love the elliptical too. I pretty much spend an hour a day 5x a week on our elliptical machine.

But recently, my Natalie decided she wanted to be a runner, so she got herself the Couch to 5K app for her phone and took off. It was hard for her at first, but she persisted - - and now {you can see it coming, right?} she is hooked on running and loves it. She's training for a half-marathon in December. I am so proud of her.

So then, she encouraged her dad to try that same program. Not to be left out, I got it on my phone, and we decided to do it together. Mostly, I was doing it to encourage Mark and to spend a little more time with him. We did great for the first 4 weeks, but at that point, Mark's knee pretty much gave out on him and he is seeing an orthopedic doc on Monday. So he's out.

But me? About that same time {4 weeks in} my body made it clear to me that it remembered that I am a runner. And I am. I am still a runner. I have now nearly completed week 5 and plan to continue and will do a 5K in October. Natalie is encouraging me to train for that same half-marathon in December.

Not sure if I will get there or not. But what I am sure of is that I have missed running and my body knows it. It makes me happy. And my feet? Well, they hurt all the time anyhow and it's no worse when I"m running.

So I am running again, and loving it.

It's my Birthday!

I guess that last post about aging leads right into this one - it's my birthday today!

I can't say that I'm 'happy' to be another year older but I do appreciate being another year smarter, despite the wrinkles that seem to accompany anything I do anymore. I have so much to appreciate and to be grateful for and it just seems to get better.

I have a wonderful family: parents, siblings, in-laws (I pretty much just count them all as siblings, I think!), husband, children, more in-laws (again, just family in my mind) and now grandchildren. The older I get the more I appreciate the great family I came from, the great family Mark came from, and the fact that we have been able to create a great family of our own. I love them all dearly.

I have so many dear friends. I kind of consider myself a bit of a hermit -- but over time, I have made so many wonderful friends -- again, people I pretty much consider family. Another thing that I have learned is that people are what really matter in life. Things are fine, but people are what make our lives fuller and richer in every way.

I'm grateful for pretty good health at this point. I've definitely had my share of ups and downs in the health area, but I am so thankful that right now, I can do whatever I choose to do, as long as I put my mind to it. I am running again and that makes me more happy than I would have thought. I'm so grateful to Natalie for encouraging both Mark and I to try it (for me, again -- for him, the first time) and that my body knew all along that I was a runner -- I've just been on hiatus!

So happy birthday to me! And I'm hoping for a zillion more!

Aging

"Aging seems to be the only available way to live a longer life." ~D.F.E. Auber

I found this quote on one of my calendar pages recently and while it made me laugh at first, it kind of struck a chord with me. My dad will be 88 on August 3 and my mom is 86 and they are not enjoying aging because of all the things that go along with it. They both use walkers now, Dad is in pretty much constant pain and has a hard time getting around. Mom is on oxygen 100% of the time and has a pacemaker along with other physical limitations. Neither of them is loving this season of their life, as it's frustrating to them to not be able to do everything they'd like to do.

I really hate seeing them be this restricted at this point. After all, they were (and are) wonderful parents, active, responsible members of the Church and always made a great contribution to whatever they were involved in (and it was a lot!). I wish for them that they could do more of the things they'd like to do.

But on the other hand, I suspect (just from my own personal experience in this area!) that what they are experiencing is exactly what comes of living a long, full life. And the alternative is not a great one.

It makes the reminders my mom gives us very real: "Make sure you do everything you want to do and see everything you want to see before you can't do it anymore." She is grateful that they did go and do a lot of things while they still could.

I intend to do that, and for now, I'm grateful that I have both of them still here on the earth with us.

*picture by Mary Engelbreit